"She's American", french kissing & more eating...

In exploring life as a Parisian, I have come to understand that life is very much all about food. Food is an experience here. Food brings together family and friends. Food connects us. It seems, at times, my life is all about the next meal. We eat dinner with Joe’s mother and boy-friend most nights. We join his father and sometimes friends for at least one meal a week. Then I follow Joe around to more dinner & lunches with extended family members for holidays and family events. Needless, to say, I am enjoying the good food, and company, but my wardrobe is dwindling.


From showing me how to cut my meat, to introducing me to French cheese, Joe & I have shared some very humorous moments over food in Paris. Then there is Normandy… Last fall, Joe took me for a weekend to Normandy more specifically Deauville. It was a majestic beachside, fishing village. It looked exactly like what you expect of a fishing village in France. Up until then, most of my food experience in France was meats (mostly ham), cheese and bread. In Normandy, you enjoy the freshest seafood imaginable. So when ordering off my pre-fixe menu, I naturally order a seafood tasting for my entrance (or “entre” confusing for Americans!). I had no idea what was on it, but it seemed like a good idea. When the plate arrived, it was covered in little crustaceans that looked like they could walk right off my plate. Joe greeted his plate with a ,“Mmm”, then immediately started eating. I just stared at my plate contemplating how I was going to manage to eat the little guys looking at me. For the record, I don’t eat whole fish, I don’t do whole lobster and I don’t like to eat parts of the animal that still resemble an animal. When Joe finally looked up and saw I had barely touched my plate, he asked, “What’s the problem?” I replied, with a bewildered expression, “They are looking at me.” Apparently, eating the fish or crustacean whole is apart of the experience. It’s a sign of the freshness of the seafood. This is not an experience I wish to partake, so Joe took my plate and beheaded & dismembered all the little guys as I looked away. I promptly placed a leaf of lettuce over the side of the plate where bits & pieces lay feeling somewhat guilty. Before the next course was served, Joe requested that all head and tails be removed from the plate. The server looked somewhat confused. Joe explained, “She’s American and not used such presentation.”


“She’s American.” is an expression I have become quite accustom to these days. It seems to explain a lot to people in a very short amount of time. For example, I remember the first party Joe took me to in Paris; we ended up hanging out near the entrance while partygoers came in. I felt so awkward as EVERY SINGLE person came in, immediately gave their name and greeted me with K2 or “kiss,kiss”. I smiled as big as I could, eyes wide turning to Joe with my look of “what the hell is going on?” while this all would transpire. I wasn’t sure if they thought they knew me already or if I was the party host. Eventually, someone would pick up on my confusion. Then Joe would throw in the, “She’s American” speech while he could and turn to me with an amused grin to explain. They would nod with an “OOOOH!” a sudden recognition that I wasn’t a complete social retard. Shortly after, someone asked me if the typical greeting in the states was a hug. I told them it was simply a handshake unless you were already VERY familiar with the person…another “OOOOH!”, but this time with less enthusiasm seeming more perplexed by our rather “impersonal” greeting.


I’m still never sure how to greet people, but unlike in the states, you are supposed to acknowledge every person regardless of how many (could be 10+) or in what circumstance. Whether you greet with a “kiss, kiss” or a handshake seems to depend on the level of intoxication and formality of the party. Though the whole K2 thing is very welcoming & friendly, it really throws me off. I’m never sure if I am doing it right or when to do it. Not to mention, it's just a little too close for comfort when meeting a complete stranger. Whenever possible, Joe tries to let people know I am American upon first meeting. However, this seems to lead to more confusion. Sometimes this is disregarded and they immediately go in for a K2, sometimes they immediately put out their hand for a handshake, or worse stop mid K2 to awkwardly shake hands. Then, sometimes I am only required to kiss the woman on the cheek and shake the man’s hand. It’s all very confusing! At this point, I have decided to wait a moment to see what the other person does first. If they looked as confused as me, I just smile, nod and say, “echanté” trying to seem more, well, French. I’m still never really sure if I look as awkward as I feel or if I’m pulling off the whole routine, but it’s worth a shot.