It's a new year with lot's of potential. Granted, I started mine off with a head butt to a kitchen cabinet and I am now sporting a nice shiner just above my left eye. So, yes, I literally started 1.1.11 off with a bang! Casualty of a hangover while cleaning up after a nice gathering. You'd think after years of bartending and already paying my dues with yelling at cabbies to pull over while I purge my mix of forgettable cocktails would have taught me a lesson...DO NOT mix! In my defense, we ran out of champagne, so just after the clock struck 12am I grabbed the nearest thing...vodka! I shutter at the thought.
With that being said, I made my new years wishes, resolutions and spent my last week of 2010 strolling the streets of Amsterdam. By the way, I HEART Amsterdam. GREAT city! Imagine the best parts of Manhattan culture, nightlife and Brooklyn brownstones & chic shops pushed all together with a cool Anglo-Europe vibe. Okay, back on topic... So, I spent my last week reflecting on my past year and all the changes/growth that I've endured. I love the idea of a New Year and new beginnings, but I've learned my lesson that the past doesn't just dissolve in time. It will haunt us if we let it. Yes, time heals all wounds but the memories prevail.
Let me regress just a little. This time last year I was in a frenzy to close up shop for an indefinite amount of time on my New York life and take a breather from all the chaos. My next stop, Paris if all went as planned! On top of taking a breather, I needed to take some time to explore life with who could possibly be the love of my life. New York is no place to start a fledging relationship especially one that is intercontinental between a musician/bartender & VERY french student. I spent the past 2 years before in a marathon run with a list of "Mr. Wrongs". Not to mention, I was slaving away as a bar manager/bartender all the while pursuing a music career. I was too exhausted to make sense of it all, and deep down I new it was time to jump out of the familiar. Paris with my love sounded like a good place to start. A year later, I am engaged and planning my return to the city. I am both excited and terrified. I can't afford to fall back into old routines and wonder what the city will look like through my new pair of eyes. I've learned a great deal about myself, relationships and the endurance & fragility of love. Nothings perfect and it all requires a delicate balance of selflessness as well as selfishness. I haven't mastered it yet, but I'm up for the challenge. This year, I just hope to be a better me!
Bonne Année!
- City Girl
No comments:
Post a Comment